Orion's Trip to the Pound

Yesterday, I took my new fur-baby, Orion, to BARC, the city pound, to get neutered. I would have taken him to my own vet, but the surgery is expensive and BARC was going to do it for free. So, to BARC we went.

Orion is a ginger tabby, about 10 months to a year old. He's got spunk and personality and a VOICE. Oh my gosh, does he ever love to talk! He was especially vocal yesterday morning because I had removed his food and water the night before and the poor guy was hungry and thirsty! From his perspective, he was being perfectly reasonable. And I must admit meowing "I'm hungry!" and "I'm thirsty!" is much preferred to knocking things over or tearing up furniture (or my leg)! But I had to resist the urge to give in. And yet as many times as I told him he couldn't have any food or water, he just wouldn't listen. Or maybe he couldn't understand.

I put Orion in the same cardboard carrier that we'd brought him home in for the ride back to BARC. We have a nice soft carrier that I use for trips to the vet, but I didn't want to leave it at the pound all day, and maybe not get it back. Of course, when I tried to explain that to Orion, he again did not understand.

The entire way to the facility (a 45 minute trip downtown), Orion cried. He cried and cried. He stuck his paw out through the tiny round holes in the cardboard carrier. He tried to stick his nose out of the holes, which worked about as well as you'd expect. And he would try to turn his head to stair out the hole at me. And all the time, he cried.

My heart broke. All Orion knew was that he was hungry and thirsty, and locked up in a dark cardboard box that smelled like the pound, cut off from his new mommy and being taken away from his new big brother. And I would shortly be dropping him off at the pound and leaving him there. WOE IS HE! How much horrible could life get? What did Orion do to deserve such treatment? He had done everything that he could to be a loving, happy kitty. He didn't attack the dogs, he didn't beat up the old cat. He slept well and purred lots and gave lots of love. He might have damaged a few of mommy's possessions beyond repair (*cough*DDR mat*cough*), but he was a good boy about using the litter box and he was learning not to attack the "bedmice" unless they were under 3 layers of blankets! What did he do that was worthy of such rejection?!

I wanted to tell Orion that it would be okay. To explain to him that I had his best interests at heart. I tried to tell him. But he just couldn't understand. So, I just listened to him cry and I offered a prayer for God to keep him safe. And then I dropped him off at BARC and promised him that I'd be back. Of course, he didn't understand.

As I drove away, a thought occurred to me. How often are we in the same position as Orion. We may not be closed up in cardboard boxes and taken to the pound to be neutered against our will, but there are no doubt times when we find ourselves spiritually thirsty, hungry for something we can't find, and lost in the darkness. Life is throwing us rotten fruit after rotten fruit. Nothing is going our way. We may have lost everything that we treasured in life, and we may not know what tomorrow will bring. Perhaps we even believe that God has abandoned us, and we wonder, what did we do to deserve this fate?

What I find interesting in this example is that just as Orion could not comprehend the bigger picture, we cannot always understand the plan that God has in store for us. He'd tell us, I think, if we could understand. But compared to God's omniscience, we are more simpleminded than a 2 week old kitten. We cannot understand God's plans because we are not God. We do not have the mental capacities to wrap our thoughts around all that He is and all that He knows. It's not that God has abandoned us, and it is not that God refuses to let us in on His great plan. I think the issue is simply that we are physically incapable of comprehending what He wants for His children.

Another interesting realization that I made is that when I drove Orion to the vet, I could not explain to him what was going on. I could not console him in terms that he understood. But I was there. I heard him cry out. And I cried with him. Is God not the same? When we cry in the darkness, He doesn't wave us off with a "Oh, you'll get over it." He cries with us. Even knowing what He knows, He cries with us, because we are crying.

Yesterday afternoon, I picked up Orion at BARC just as I promised. I took with me our soft carrier and he rode home in that, where he could look out at me the entire time. He meowed for a while, then he fell asleep. When we got home, I gave him all the food he could eat and all the water he could drink. Trevor gave him a thorough face-bath. And last night, Orion slept the entire night in my arms. He was back home, right where he belongs.

Decorate the Walls

I've been gnawing on an idea lately and I'm not yet sure where I'm going with it, or if there's anywhere to go, but I'll share it with you all anyway. It comes from yet another song by the infamous Jimmy Buffett. This one is a love song called Coast of Carolina. The chorus goes like this:

From the bottom of my heart
Off the coast of Carolina
After one or two false starts
I believe we found our stride
And the walls that won't come down
We can decorate or climb
Or find some way to get around
Cause I'm still on your side
From the bottom of my heart.


Kinda sweet, huh? So, the part that's been nigging at me is the line:

"And the walls that won't come down, we can decorate or climb or find some way to get around."

...we can decorate. Now there's some imagery. And metaphors just waiting to come alive.

I mean, even among the people that we love the most, there are always walls. Those things that divide us. Issues we disagree on. Points of contention. And in a good relationship, we are always taught the benefits of tearing down those walls. Tear down the walls that separate countries, and the smaller walls that separate individual people. All over the place we find this imagery of the wall. In my neighborhood there is a church called "The Church Without Walls." We all know the metaphor, the goal. World peace? It would be a world without walls.

And yet... the pessimist in me can't help but laugh. The goal is all well and good, but like it or not, people are different. There will always be walls, because we will always draw lines. We have to. You know - "You gotta stand for something or you'll fall for anything." But I'm not even talking about those moral lines. There will be other walls, too. Because we are all different. We like different things. We see different things. We are all unique. To tear down every wall would be to tear down what separates our uniqueness. So, I laugh and go, "Yeah right... tear down the walls... sure, you do that. I'm going to go sit in my room surrounded by my safe walls and read a book."

Are you a pessimist or an optimist? I didn't realize that you could be both until I started really thinking about Jimmy Buffett's words. He's admitting that, even in his own marriage, he can't tear down every wall. So what will he do with those walls that won't come down? He'll decorate them.

...

I just... hold on, I'm still trying to wrap my mind around the novelty of the concept.

Decorate... the walls?

Celebrate our differences? Not just the differences between our cultures, but between us and the family and friends that we love the most?

... wow. Whoda thunk?

Tuesday Evening Chapel - My Devotional

Just this past week, one of the members of my Proverbs 31 e-mail group suggested an experiment. She suggested that we try to come up with as many words that describe God as we can that start with the first letter of that day of the week. On Monday, we came up with magnificent, mindblowing, and the ultimate multitasker. On Tuesday, God was truth, triumphant and totally trustworthy. This continued through Sunday, when God was supercalifragilisticexpialidocious. Isn't it amazing how many words we can use to describe our God? We could go on and on, and no one word would be sufficient to describe him fully.

The Bible is filled with a multitude of words used to refer to God. In the Hebrew, we hear names such as Elohim, proclaiming the Lord as the one true God, and El Shaddai which describes God as The Almighty. In English, we have many names for God as well.

We call Him God - the divine being of immeasurable power who created the world and continues to mold it as He wills. He has powers we can not comprehend, and knows more than we can ever dream.

We call Him our Lord. The 'our' is important here, since with these words, we are naming God our superior, just as the middle age serfs answered to the call of the lords who governed their lands. When we cry out to our Lord, we are giving Him the authority to govern our lives.

We call Him Father. Just as a father wishes to have a meaningful relationship with his children, so does our Holy Father wish to hold a meaningful relationship with us. He supports us, teaches us, encourages us as we grow and learn. And He loves us, more than we can imagine.

To be honest, I've only just picked at the tip of the ice berg. What other names do we give God? What roles does He play in our lives? In Grace for the Moment, Max Lucado writes:

God is
The shepherd who guides
The Lord who provides
The voice who brings peace in the storm
The physician who heals the sick, and
The banner that guides the soldier.

In her song "I am," Nicole Nordeman sings:

When life had begun, I was woven and spun,
You let the angels dance around the throne,
And who can say when,
But they’ll dance again, when I am free and finally headed home

I will be weak, unable to speak,
still I will call You by name
“Creator, Maker, Life-sustainer,
Comforter, Healer, My Redeemer,
Lord and King, Beginning and
the End.

Who is God for you today? Who was He for you yesterday? Who will He be for you tomorrow?

Amen.

Word Associations: The Names of God

I don't spend enough time in meditation and Bible study - that is absolutely for certain. I finally got around to picking up Max Lucado's Grace for the Moment book and I'd like to see if I can come up with some "food for thought" for as many days as possible. I'll do this by reading the entry each morning and then going back to contemplate it throughout the day. I can't promise that these thoughts will be coherent or follow any logical sequence. But that's okay.

Today's devotional is about the various names that God has, the roles that He plays. Here is a little excerpt from Lucado's book:

"The shepherd who guides
The Lord who provides
The voice who provides peace in the storm,
The physician who heals the sick, and
The banner that guides the soldier"
- Grace for the Moment, Vol. 1, Max Lucado

I wanted to play a little word association with this piece. Nothing forced, just letting it mule in my head and seeing what came up. Here are a couple of the things that I ended up with.

"The shepherd who guides."

We could do some fun random thought tangents with these kinds of things. Here is how mine went:

"Shepherd" --> Psalm 23 (The Lord is my shepherd) --> Psalms!! --> Psalm 30 (my favorite psalm) --> "Weeping may endure for the night, but joy comes in the morning" (v. 5b)

Huh. Not really sure how to directly connect the guiding shepherd with Psalm 30:5, but it's a fun little tangent anyway. And I do love that verse.

"The physician who heals the sick."

To be honest, if we are trying to pull out Bible verses here, I am more likely to lean towards one of the ones that says "He comforts the grieving" or something like that. And I did some reflective thinking about why. It seems as though I'm more of an advocate for inner healing than external healing. I'd rather someone be at peace with their life than healthy. Now, I know that the two are often not mutually exclusive (how can you be at peace when you are in pain all the time?) but the counselor in me is still going to advocate for internal healing - and I can tell you from personal experience how often God gives that internal healing. The answer: ALL THE TIME.

"The banner that guides the soldier."

Hmm... this is something that I might have to do some more thinking about. There are some connections to be made.

I didn't used to relate to this line. I didn't now anyone overseas or in the army or anyone who knew anyone who was. But that has changed. My sister's long-time boy friend is currently in Iraq, and we're hoping to see him come home in February. And I have watched my sister go through all of the trials that any army "wife" goes through. It's definitely made the situation more real to me.

Once I made that connection to this line, I tried to think about a Bible verse. And you know what I came up with? You'll laugh. The first verse that came to mind was the one about the armor of the Lord. You know, with the sword or righteousness and stuff? Apparently, in my subconscious mind, the armor of God would not be complete without the banner of the Lord for us to rally at in the middle of the fight.

An Except from Captive Hearts

I haven't visited Captive Hearts on this blog recently. For those of you who are new to this little Blog or have forgotten (it really has been that long), Captive Hearts is the story that I am co-writing with a friend of mine, just because. You can find a basic background to Captive Hearts in my opening post, here. It's a fantasy romance/adventure. Our fantasy world is watched over by four gods: Solarus, Lunos, Vulcos and Aquios. I love working with these gods and their mortal children because each one shows me a different face of our own Holy Father. And it's interesting how often we get to touch on issues that are as real in our world as they are in this fantasy one. Here's something that happened this week in the Heartlands:

((Elliod and Kyra have just discovered that their unborn daughter, Rena, has shamanistic sensitivities.))

Elliod swallows hard, "There have only been 3 shamans among the tribes for a long time... if one is born, then one has to die."

Kyra frowns. Of course she knows this, but... "You, Hanna... and who else?"

Elliod swallows, "Rebecca... she's a cousin in the nearby Holston tribes." He pales, "Hanna... Greatmother. She's the oldest of us... unless..." He bites his lip. "Vulcos is replacing the lost shaman."

"Lost? You mean, from... from the histories?"

Elliod nods, "Do you remember the story of the first male shaman? His greatmother was killed when Dracos broke free of his bonds. Vulcos never replaced her."

Kyra nods, "But Vulcos is sleeping. She can't have enough energy to create a new shaman, can she?"

Elliod takes a deep breath, "I don't know. When she was awake, I would ask her all sorts..." He pauses, "I wonder if I would be permitted to speak to Lunos."

Kyra blinks, then can't help a bark of laughter. "Speak to Lunos? Like, what, just request an audience? She's a goddess! And not even your goddess! You can't do that... can you?"

Elliod smiles, "But see, I have an in. I'm assisting one of her beloved sons... and she allowed me to see you pregnant and fighting. Vulcos doesn't give future visions."

"Still," Kyra shakes her head, "She comes to you when she wills it. You can't just order a goddess to appear before her so that you can interrogate her."

"I'm not going to..." He sighs and reaches up to touch his forehead. "She has to understand how important this is to me. If Rena is born what will happen to my greatmother and cousin!?"

Kyra lets out her breath in a huff. "Gods, Elliod! You are as egotistical as you are dense! The world doesn't revolve around you! And you aren't a god - you don't have to know what the future holds! You have to trust that the gods will care for us. If our child is a shaman, then there's a reason for that. Stop questioning Vulcos' intentions!"

Elliod opens his mouth and gasps, "I'm not!" He protests. "I'm..." He shuts his mouth and stands, walking over to the window and looking out into the darkness with his arms crossed.

Kyra scowls, "You are," she insists. "You just can't bear not to be in total control."

Elliod readjusts his arms and glances back at Kyra without a word. He humphs and shakes his head as he looks back out the window.

Kyra narrows her eyes and says, "Prove it."

Elliod knees the bed and kneels before his wife, "I worry. I think that's part of my job too, to worry."

Kyra snorts, "That's yet another stupid thing that you've said today. Elliod, the gods don't want us to worry. They want us to trust in them."

Elliod leans forward and presses his lips to Kyra's forehead, "I can't help it sometimes." He draws his wife close. "If I love someone, I want them to be safe."

Kyra nods, "I know." She kisses Elliod on the forehead. "But we're Vulcos' children first and formost. She will take care of her own, even asleep."

Elliod sighs and chuckles. "Since when is it the Protector's job to teach about faith, Kryanthia?"

Kyra scowls, "Since you never learned it right." Then her expression does soften. "You've been spoiled, Elliod. The holy child, the gifted one, the singer, the storyteller, the dreamer. You've always had Vulcos' ear. You don't have any idea what it's like for the rest of us who simply have to trust."


This concept is fascinating to me, and something that I think has a lot of meat to it. The idea that the poor will be rich and the last will be first all spirals around to this same idea. The idea that in order to have faith, in order to trust, you must first be uncertain. To say it with different words, you can't let God take control if you are still clinging to the reins. Wow.

Questions for Heaven

"I guess in Heaven I'll learn
I'll be waiting my turn
To ask about quasars and feathers
I hope the line isn't long
I hope Your patience is strong
It's a good thing forever's forever"
-Questions for Heaven, Chris Rice

I haven't posted in a while, mostly because I've been on Summer vacation. My classes start on Monday, and I'm sure I'll have a lot of material to share then. But for now, I wanted to share a little experience of mine.

In my kittypix community, there was a famous kitty named Dusky. Famous because we all knew him by name. Dusky was a newborn kitten, abandoned by his feral momma and adopted by a pair of good samaritan humans. Kimberly and Amanda worked day and night to keep Dusky fed and when he got sick and had to go into the vet, they continued to go in every couple of hours to feed him while keeping him on oxygen. It cost lots of money as well as time and effort. But he recovered. He finally got to come home to Kimberly and he was almost off of oxygen and was looking so much better. Meanwhile, we rooted and cheered for the little guy on kittypix, basking in the multitude of pictures that Kimberly posted. He was our little hero.

And then, suddenly, he was gone. He was at the vet's and in 30 minutes, he went from fine to... gone.

Kimberly was crushed, and so were we all. I was a wreck for several days, and I have amazing friends that were here to help me through it. Now, weeks later, I have finally gotten the courage to talk about what I learned from that experience, in an e-mail to one of those close friends:


I've been doing a lot of thinking about Dusky. He's the kitten who died a few weeks back when I got really upset. The thing is, part of the reason that I was upset was that he was doing so well, and everyone was so excited and then he was just gone. It was like God had given him a challenge and the girls worked so hard and he got better and God gave everyone hope that he'd be fine, and then God just took him away. Kimberly (Dusky's foster mom) was crushed. And the other reason that I was upset is that when my sister found out, she pointed out that the mother had abandoned Dusky and a mother knows. And that pissed me off because, even though I know she's right (in nature, mothers can tell when one baby isn't likely to survive), it just... I mean, it was like, does that mean that we should just let someone die, "Oh, he's predestined to die, so we shouldn't ever bother trying to heal him." I'm sorry, but that's bull shit! God wouldn't punish someone for trying to give someone else a chance to live. So, yeah...

Anyway, this morning, something occurred to me on the way to work. I know when you face these hard questions, the response is almost always either, "You just have to accept that God has His reasons," or "We can never know the answer." But when a question is really important to you, those are not easy answers to swallow... And the truth is, I don't think they should be. Because as God's children, we SHOULD be truth seekers. And part of seeking the truth is asking questions.

Which is what led me to my realization this morning. This realization is that when I get to heaven, I am going to ask God why he took Dusky. Does that seem kind of petty and silly? Perhaps. But... The difference is subtle. It's like... I realized that I could ask questions and still trust God to know the answers, while at the same time accepting that I cannot comprehend the answers RIGHT NOW. But someday... Someday I'll see the whole picture.

I think this is a concept that I'll use when I start my practice as a Christian Counselor. There's a subtle but powerful difference between just saying, "I can never know the answer to my questions," and writing a journal of "all the questions I will ask God when I get to heaven." If the questions are important enough to us, we should not be afraid to ask them, even if we know the answer will be long coming.

So, yeah, sorry for that tangent. The reason for all of this is that when I got to work, after coming to this realization, I found that Kimberly had made an update on kitypix. Apparently, she and Amanda and several others have gone out to track down Dusky's littermates. They've found Dusky's littermates, but can't get to them yet. But they also found another little of kittens of a feral momma and brought them home so that they can have happy lives of petting and loving and sleeping on laps.

Is that why God took Dusky? So that half a dozen other kittens would get a chance to live the same life? I don't know. It's possible. Wouldn't Kimberly and Amanda have gone back for the other kittens anyway? I'd like to think so. But would Kimberly have been as determined (she spent 3 days of searching) if she hadn't just lost Dusky? I don't know. But... It's something to think about. At any rate, yeah, Dusky is on my list of things that I want to ask God about when I get to heaven.

Contemporary Music and the Role of the Psalms in the Journey of Faith

I completed my term paper for my Psalms class. It's not polished, but I had a lot of fun with the content, and learned a lot, so it's something I feel like sharing. And it's something I am excited about pursuing down different avenues in the future (more on that later). So, if you can ignore the fact that all of my formating disappeared between MSWord and Blogger, you are welcome to read it.

Introduction: The Role of the Christian Music and the Journey of Faith

The Book of Psalms has often been referred to as the prayer book or hymnal of Second Temple Jerusalem, and for good reasons. Within this one piece of work are collections of songs, dances, stories and prayers that ran the full gamut of life among the ancient Jews.[1] These songs were used for liturgy, for praise and for communicating with Yahweh, and they covered just about every role that a young Jew might need in their journey through life and through faith.[2]

In today's Christian church, the psalms have been replaced with a wide variety of Christian music, from hymns, to Contemporary Christian music, to African American gospel music. Though the variety is wide, the music of the Christian faith still bears the responsibility of filling the roles that the psalms filled for the ancient Jews. These are roles that are necessary for each person's spiritual and psychological growth as a child of God.[3][4] However, the Christian church's doctrine has changed over the years, and it has altered the view of such ideas as what makes up faith.[5] The concept of faith is a cornerstone to all of the Old Testament psalms, and with the change in Christian beliefs, the church has had to disregard or at least minimize the impact of a good portion of the psalms, most especially the laments or complaint psalms.[6]

In traditional Church worship, there are three different types of music: psalms, hymns and spiritual songs.[7] The psalms as they are defined in Christian music are not the same as the psalms of Second Temple Jerusalem. The psalms of the Old Testament included all types of music, including hymns. In modern worship, the psalms are instead described as prayers and worship songs. Paul Jones explains that psalms "teach us how to worship, and they provide fitting, biblical language with which to thank, praise, implore and glorify God. They also demonstrate confession and lament."[8] Note that though Jones does not leave out the mention of laments entirely, he does minimize their role in his explanation by using mild language such as "implore" and by pairing the lament with the confession, with confession being first, in order and most likely in importance.

In his book, Praying Twice: The Music and Words of Congregational Song, Brian Wren goes so far as to list out all of the characteristics that a song must have to be considered a congregational psalm. It must be: devout, just, frugal, beautiful, communal, purposeful, and musical.[9] Although Wren's criteria are meant to apply specifically to congregational music, it must be remembered that for the ancient Jews, there were no private songs. All psalms were public or congregational, and were to be sung aloud so that everyone who heard the psalmist might either celebrate with him if he was happy or mourn with him if he was sad.[10] The picture Wren paints is of a perfect hymn to be sung in a perfect world where there is no injustice or pain or sorrow. While these perfect hymns are important, they do not by themselves fill out the complete set of roles the psalms in the Old Testament filled.

Secular Music: When World and Faith Collide

Today's Christian music has failed to fill several important roles to guide people through this wild and unpredictable world, so the role has been filled by secular music instead. Secular songs are not handicapped by Christian doctrine, and they are often willing to ask the questions that every person struggles with, without feeling the pressure to always have the answer. In this paper, three types of secular music styles will be used in order to explore the power that secular music can have on a person's faith. These styles are country music, children's songs, and show tunes, specifically soundtrack music from stage productions. There are very distinct reasons why each of these three styles should be examined.

Country Music is a grass roots style of music that has its origins deep in the culture of those who sing it - then and now. It began as a gathering of banjos and fiddles on porches during the 1920's, transformed into what is known as the "Honky Tonk" style of country music with such performers as Hank Williams at the forefront in 1950s. At this time, the "old west" had become the "wild west," and country music represented the unquenchable spirit and grit that was required of those who called that region their home. In the years since, the "wild west" and once again transformed, this time into the "southwest", a mellower, more crowded but not always more civilized version of its younger self. Country music has followed suit, and over the years the genre has gone through at least 3 more stages, including the "urban country" style of the 1980s.[11]

Through all of these transformations, it is easy to see that country music is bound to and given life by the culture of those who sing it. From the very beginning, the residents of the west have had to be strong and determined. Faith was vital, as was the relationships that kept people united against the hostile environment. Even today, in modern country music, you can see those values alive in the songs sung, whether they are written in Nashville, Hollywood, or rural horse ranch in central Texas. Perhaps that is why the genre of country music is much more outwardly accepting of expressions of faith in its music. While country music might use blunt and even harsh language at times or otherwise offend a listener's sensitivities, it is also one of the few styles of music where one can hear songs that could just as easily be played on a Christian radio station. Honest statements of faith can be found everywhere in the realm of modern country music; very few country music artists will release an album that does not have at least one song that puts voice to their personal faith.

In 2009, the Christian music group Point of Grace made the announcement that they would be shifting from the Contemporary Christian music arena to the Country music one. Their songs have not changed much, if at all, and still present a vivid picture of living the life of faith. When asked how these songs were being accepted by the Country music market, they replied, "Just as the Christian market has embraced songs from Martina McBride and Carrie Underwood, I think that the country market is accepting our music. So much of country music through the years has been rooted in faith, so I think that this could be a very natural fit for us."[12] Country music really is one of the few musical genres where it's okay to be secular and still sing about God.

Children songs can come from many sources, but the ones referred to in this text are most often from moves or stories that are directed towards children. Although classically, those movies are produced by Walt Disney Inc., there is plenty of music that is released by other producers as well. These songs are important because they represent our society's replacement for the wisdom psalms of ancient Israel. The purpose of the wisdom psalms was to teach the next generation the lessons they would need to know to become good, successful, upstanding citizens, and the same can be said for the songs that today's culture teaches its children. In the movie Beauty and the Beast, for example, the song "Be Our Guest," teaches children about hospitality, while the song "Something There," makes a statement to children about second chances.[13] From older Disney films come songs like "Who's Afraid of the Bid Bad Wolf?", which teaches about hard work,[14] and Mary Poppins' famous lesson about "A Spoonful of Sugar."[15] Disney does not hold the monopoly on children's wisdom music. In 1998, Dreamworks released its first traditionally animated movie, Prince of Egypt. Through this movie, children both Christian and non-Christian were introduced to one of the most famous Bible stories of the Old Testament. The songs, likewise, are powerful lessons that could have come straight out of the Bible, but instead were presented to a secular audience for every child to experience and enjoy. These songs included, "When You Believe," "Through Heaven's Eyes," and "Humanity," which taught lessons of faith, compassion and diversity.[16]

In 2000, Dreamworks released the sequel to Prince of Egypt in a direct-to-video movie, Joseph, King of Dreams.[17] Though an official soundtrack was never released for the movie, one of the songs, "Better than I," was picked up by Contemporary Christian music artist Joy Williams and re-recorded for release on her 2001 self-titled album, Joy.[18] It is through these types of songs that we teach our children the laws of wisdom, and so they continue to have a powerful effect on our lives and our growth as human beings.

Lastly, stage productions and plays provide a unique view of the human condition, and their music can bring that human condition into an emotional and powerful perspective. Unlike movies, which often feature action and adventure and special effects, the stars of every stage production are the actors and the characters that they portray. There is nothing to distract the audience from the acting going on before them, and so they get an unhindered view of the drama and raw emotion that is being shared. When playwrights add music to that, it gives the emotion a venue more vital than speech alone. What the audience receives, then, is the result of drama plus music: human emotion at its most intense.[19] It is not a surprise that some of the laments that are found among popular show tunes could probably be transplanted into the middle of the book of Psalms and not look at all out of place.

Using these three styles of secular music, it is easy to see how some of the roles of the psalms have been taken up and filled by secular music, rather than by church music. The biggest and arguably most important role to be filled by secular music is the role of the lament psalms.

Laments: Crying Out to God

During the time of the second temple, the ancient Jews took their laments very seriously. In these songs, the Jews were able to cry out to Yahweh for rescue, healing or protection. These laments were often harsh and blunt, and most began with imperatives such as those in Psalm 55 vv. 1-2a: "Listen to my prayer, O God, do not ignore my plea; hear me and answer me…."[20] The laments then proceeded to lay out for Yahweh what has happened to make the singer so miserable, what Yahweh should do about it, and why Yahweh should take action.[21] This genre of psalms makes up almost a third of the Book of Psalms, despite that fact that the Christian church has historically pretended that the lament genre does not exist. One reason why, according to Walter Brueggemann, is that the lament psalms describe a relationship with God that requires a different type of faith than the kind we are taught to have.[22] Evidence for this can be found in any person who has ever advised a friend on their worries with the words, "You just have to have faith." It seems to be an unspoken part of the Christian church's doctrine that faith in God is identical to an unquestioning acceptance of everything God does or does not do.

It is not surprising, then, that music in the Christian church should renew and reinforce the believer's personal faith in God. This has made the topic of what exactly is appropriate content in Christian music a sensitive topic. Put another way, Best explains: "the subject [of Christian music] cannot be disconnected from central matters of faith. Everything done musically bust be defended and critiqued theological and biblically."[23]

As a result of this focus on the appropriate content of Christian music, the laments have been almost entirely left out of the Christian songbooks. They represent moments of a believer's life when he challenges God, crying out to Him to change what He is doing - either by dropping everything and coming to the believer's aid or by ceasing whatever act God is taking that is harming the believer. While some, including Brueggemann, argue that this style of prayer actually exhibits a more powerful faith, because the lamenter has no doubts about coming to God in his misery, the doctrines of the Christian church nevertheless prefer to avoid this idea of questioning God.

When the Church does recognize the power of the laments, it is usually in respect to looking backwards, into the past. The laments are accepted as songs that needed to be sung by the Jews during the exile and then later by the African American slaves and still more recently by the Jews during the holocaust.[24] But the study of the laments appears to be confined to those horrific events that the world can look back on and recognize as a crisis worthy of being lamented. There is no room, it seems, for the laments in the faith of a modern American Christian.

In Christian music, this division between faith and the laments come out in two ways. The first is that there are some topics that very few, if any, Christian music artists will dare to touch on. The second is that when Christian music artists do address particular issues, they will invariably provide the song as a lesson to those listening, and in so doing, miss the actual issue at hand. In his book, Pop Goes the Church, Stevens argues that everyone has filters or glasses that they see and interpret the world through,[25] and this can also be seen in how Christian music artists or song-writers will address a sensitive topic with rose colored glasses - attempting to convince all who hear that no matter what the issue is, God is in control and God will come through. In many ways, by using these filters in how they tell their stories, Christian song-writers are participating in denial - denial that sometimes God doesn't come through, and that sometimes a person's life can crash around them with no sign of God's order anywhere to be found.

The problem this leads to is that when believers do find themselves in the grips of "the valley of the shadow of death,"[26] it is not surprising that these Christian songs, while encouraging, offer no guidance to the one who is currently crying out in the darkness. The ancient Jews needed the lament psalms to express themselves in their anguish, not just during the exile but during all the time, and that medium needed for us today as well. While Christian music cannot fill this role in its current state, the role is nevertheless filled - by secular music. Despite the fact that the laments make up almost a third of the Book of Psalms, laments in today's secular music massively outnumber those found in today's Christian music. The lament, while still necessary and present in our world, has been taken up by the music of the worldly.

My Endless Night: The Personal Lament

A term that is often used to describe those moments of lamenting is "disorientation."[27] Walter Brueggemann first coined the term, combining it with the stages of orientation and re-orientation to describe the cycle of crises of faith that everyone goes through at different points in their lives.

In an article on The Sojourner, Michael Warden also addressed the importance of the disorientation stage in our lives.[28] He compared it to the abyss, one of the stages of the hero's journey in classical rhetoric. Warden's argument is that in order to be a hero, one is required to descend into the abyss at some point or another. Without making it through the abyss, one cannot become a hero. It should not be a surprise, then, that most of the dark laments that you will find in secular music are part of a larger story - the story of a hero. But the truth is that everyone will find themself in the abyss at some point in their life, and that universality gives these songs the power to connect the raw emotions of the hero with everyone who hears his cry.

There are few stories that are as filled with these moments in the abyss as the Broadway stage musical, Rent. While Christians have universally found the play and the resulting movie morally offensive,[29] there is no arguing that the play presents a down and dirty look at life in the alleys of urban America,[30] and the laments found between the Overture and Finale are some of the most heart-wrenching songs to ever grace Broadway's stages. One classic example is "Will I?" The song begins as a single man with AIDs expresses his fears about the future.

"Will I lose my dignity?
Will someone care?
Will I wake tomorrow,
from this nightmare?"[31]

With each progressive verse, the man is joined by more men, then by women, until the words are being sung as a round and in such a way that the music itself seems to leave the listener feeling as disoriented as the characters must be.

A lot of laments can be found among children's entertainment as well. In 2003, children and their parents made their way to the theatres to meet Kenai, a young Inuit hunter who must learn a valuable lesson about respecting people who do not look or think like him. For Kenai, the abyss comes with the realization of the harm he has done, and the sins he has committed:

"There's no way out of this dark place
No hope, no future
I know I can't be free
But I can't see another way
I can't face another day."[32]

What's curious is that, like so many traditional lament psalms, "No Way Out" finishes with an interlude and then an upturn to a positive ending. In this case, it is grace and forgiveness that Kenai is offered, but the ending of the song is nevertheless reminiscent of the final verses of most lament psalms that end by giving praise to Yahweh despite the troubles that they've suffered.

Another secular lament with a classical structure comes from the Broadway stage production of Disney's Lion King, a song that can be placed among both the show tunes and the children's songs. In "Endless Night", Simba mirrors the style of the traditional lament psalms even more closely. His song is directed up at the stars and the being among them that holds a spiritual hold over Simba's life - his father.

"You promised you'd be there
Whenever I needed you
Whenever I call your name
You're not anywhere
I'm trying to hold on
Just waiting to hear your voice
One word, just a word will do
To end this nightmare"[33]

While songs of true lament are everywhere in secular music, they are much harder to find in Christian music, even Contemporary Christian music. In their 2009 single "Always," Building 429 came as close as most Christian song-writers are willing to go into the realm of the laments. But even while dipping their toes into the pool of the broken, the group continues to insist that their faith is strong that God will prevail.

"But I believe always, always
Our Savior never fails
Even when all hope is gone
God knows our pain and His promise remains
He will be with you always"[34]

While there is nothing wrong with the statement that this song makes, what is important to note is that this song would not be considered a lament song, but one of comfort and encouragement. It is a song that, like all others in its genre, feels the need to offer an answer to every one of life's questions that is asked of it. Unfortunately, sometimes the answers just aren't there to be had.

Communal Laments: Common Issues, Uncommon Songs

Each one of the previous examples are referred to here as "individual" lament psalms not just because they express the cry of one individual (or a group of individuals in the case of "Will I?"), but also because the cause of the disorientation of the singer is individualized. Though many people will be able to relate to Simba's feeling of abandonment and despair, fewer have ever been in exactly his position before, as he believes himself to be the cause of his own father's death.

There are also topics and cultural issues that affect a large number of people, and these subjects can often draw out a variety of songs from a variety of points of view and musical genres. The big example of this in the United States today is the number of men, women and children whose loved ones have gone overseas to war. It's not surprising to see the number of songs that come up about that very personal issue - of being the one left behind to maintain the house and pray for their loved one's safe return. What is surprising is to see the different views that these songs can take. Christian music, for example, has very few songs that address this dilemma, this disorientation crisis. One of those few is "Letters from War," by Mark Schultz. The song tells the story of a woman whose only son has gone off to war. A few months later, she receives word that he has been captured. Her response is described as that of a woman whose faith if even greater than her worry for her son.

"And she prayed he was living
Kept on believing
And wrote every night just to say

You are good
And you're brave
what a father that you'll be someday
Make it home
Make it safe
Still she kept writing each day"[35]

At the end of the Schultz's song, the boy comes home after two years of being missing, promoted to captain and then discharged from duty so that he can return to his mother, tote bags stuffed with all of her letters slung over his shoulder. The moral of the song seems to be that if a woman has enough faith, if she prays hard enough and waits long enough, God will bring her boy back safely. It's a beautiful concept, but not one that is capable of reaching most of the women who are in this same position. Their question is both understandable and predictable: "What if he doesn't come back?" Unfortunately, that is a question that Christian music either does not have the answer to or does not wish to share. Instead, the heavy weight of life's hardest questions is left to the secular side of music.

One way for a wife or mother to connect with the disorientation of their son or husband going to war is by stepping back in time and taking a skip across the Atlantic Ocean to France during the industrial revolution.

"God on high
Hear my prayer
In my need
You have always been there

He is young
He's afraid
Let him rest
Heaven blessed.
Bring him home."[36]

"Bring Him Home," presents a beautiful illustration of a man who is pleading with God, and even goes so far as to attempt to bargain with God later on in the song - offering his life for the life of the boy. Valjean's faith is strong, but that doesn't keep him from attempting to call in a favor or two with his God.

There are even more examples of this issue closer to home. Songs about men going to war abound throughout the secular music of the past 5 or 10 years. One of those is "Come Home Soon," by SheDaisy. The song is dedicated to all of those Americans who are currently serving overseas and the families that remain at home, waiting for their return. The interesting part is that while "Come Home Soon" does not provide the answers, nor does it promise the men's safe returns, it does nevertheless offer hope:

"I still imagine your touch
It's beautiful missing something that much
But sometimes love needs a fighting chance
So I'll wait my turn until it's our turn to dance

I walk alone
I try alone
I'll wait for you, don't want to die alone
So please, come home soon"[37]

In this way, SheDaisy is able to put into words and music the emotions being felt by thousands of other men, women and children who are in this same position, and SheDaisy does so by offering hope and faith without giving the answers that they don't have to give. This song provides a salve as "Letters of War" could not.

Finding Faith in Secular Music: It's Nothing New

In Acts 17, Paul is found preaching to a group of Athenian philosophers. In verse 28, Paul states, "'For in him we live and move and have our being.' As some of your own poets have said, 'We are his offspring.'"[38] Paul is not quoting the Old Testament here, but he is using lines from Epimenides and Cleanthes, both of whom were popular secular poets of the time (Cleanthes' poem was even a tribute to Zeus!)[39]

Using secular culture to reach those who do not speak the language of the faithful is not a new thing, but using secular culture to enrich the faith of the faithful might be. Nevertheless, secular music continues to play a vital role in most journeys of faith due to the roles that the music plays which fill a gap between what the ancient psalms accomplished and what our Christian music is capable of accomplishing today.

References

Bailey, Wilma Ann. 2005. Music in Christian Worship. Edited by Charlotte Kroeker. The Sorrow Songs: Laments from the Old Testament and the African Experience. Collegeville: Liturgical Press.

Begbie, Jeremy S. 2007. Resounding Truth: Christian Wisdom in the World of Music. Grand Rapids: Baker Academic.

Best, Harold M. 1993. Music Through the Eyes of Faith. New York: Harper Collins.

Brueggemann, Walter. 1984. The Message of the Psalms. Minneapolis: Augsburg Publishing House.

Building 429. 2008. "Always, Always," in Building 429, performed by Building 429. INO Records, Compact Disc.

Chapman, Brenda & Wells, Simon. 1998. Prince of Egypt, staring Val Kilmer, 100 min. Dreamworks Animated, DVD.

Cockrel, Lisa Ann. 2005. "Rent" Christianity Today. http://www.christianitytoday.com/movies/reviews/2005/rent.html (accessed May 5, 2009).

Collins, Phil. 2003. "No Way Out [Single Version]," in Brother Bear performed by Phil Collins. Walt Disney Records, Compact Disc.

DeLuca, Rob & Ramirez, Robert C. 2000. Joseph: King of Dreams, staring Ben Affleck, 75 min. Dreamworks Animated, DVD.

Goldingay, John. 2006. Psalms, vol. 1, Psalms 1-41. Grand Rapids: Baker Academic.

Hopkins, Denise Dombkowski. 2002. Journey Through the Psalms. St. Louis: Chalice Press.

Jones, Paul S. 2006. Singing and Making Music: Issues in Church Music Today. Phillipsburg: P&R Publishing.

Kenrick, John. 1996. "A History of the Musical: What is a Musical?" Musicals101.com, revised 2007. http://www.musicals101.com/musical.htm (accessed May 4, 2009).

Larson, Jonathon. 1996. "Will I?", in Rent, Performed by Original Broadway Cast. Dreamworks, Compact Disc.

Mangum, Willie R., Jr. 2005. "Rent" ChristianAnswers.net. https://christiananswers.net/spotlight/movies/2005/rent2005.html (accessed May 5, 2009).

O'Hara, Paige & Benson, Robby. 2002. Beauty and the Beast, directed by Gary Trousdale, 84 min. Walt Disney Video, DVD.

Point of Grace. 2009. "Point of Grace: Gone Country?" Interview by Country Music Planet. http://www.christianmusicplanet.com/news/stories/11576520/ (accessed on May 4, 2009).

Rice, Tim & John, Elton. 1997. "Endless Night," in The Lion King Broadway Production performed by Original Cast. Avex Trax Japan, Compact Disc.

Roughtstock.com. 2009. "Roughstock's History of Country Music," Cheri Media Group. http://www.roughstock.com/history/ (accessed May 4, 2009).

Saliers, Don E. 2007. Music and Theology. Nashville: Abingdon Press.

Schonberg, Claude-Michel & Boublil, Alain. 1990. "Bring Him Home," in Les Miserables (Original London Cast Recording), performed by Colm Wilkinson. DECCA U.S., Compact Disc.

Schultz, Mark. "Letters from War," in Stories and Songs, performed by Mark Schultz. Word Records, Compact Disc.

SheDaisy. 2004. "Come Home Soon," in Sweet Right Here, performed by SheDaisy. Lyric Street, Compact Disc.

Sherman, Richard M. and Sherman, Robert B. 1964. "A Spoonful of Sugar," in Mary Poppins, performed by Julie Roberts, directed by Robert Stevenson. Walt Disney.

Stalling, Carl W. 1933. "Who's Afraid of the Big Bad Wolf?" in The Three Little Pigs, directed by Burt Gillet. Walt Disney.

Stevens, Tim. 2008. Pop Goes the Church: Should The Church Engage Pop Culture? Indianapolis: Power Publishing.

Williams, Joy. 2001. "Better than I", in Joy, Performed by Joy Williams. Reunion Records, Compact Disc.

Wren, Brian. 2000. Praying Twice: The Music and Words of Congregational Song. Louisville: Westminster John Knox Press.

[1] Jeremy S. Begbie, Resounding Truth: Christian Wisdom in the World of Music (Grand Rapids: Baker Academic, 2007), 60.
[2] John Goldingay, Psalms, vol. 1, Psalms 1-41, (Grand Rapids: Baker Academic, 2006), 60-69.
[3] Don E. Saliers, Music and Theology (Nashville: Abingdon Press, 2007), 33.
[4] Paul S. Jones, Singing and Making Music: Issues in Church Music Today (Phillipsburg: P&R Publishing, 2006), 89.
[5] Walter Brueggemann, The Message of the Psalms (Minneapolis: Augsburg Publishing House, 1984), 52.
[6] Denise Dombkowski Hopkins, Journey Through the Psalms (St. Louis: Chalice Press, 2002).
[7] Jeremy S. Begbie, Resounding Truth, 69.
[8] Paul S. Jones, Singing and Making Music, 102.
[9] Brian Wren, Praying Twice: The Music and Words of Congregational Song (Louisville: Westminster John Knox Press, 2000), 175-188.
[10] Jeremy S. Begbie, Resounding Truth, 60.
[11] Roughtstock.com, "Roughstock's History of Country Music," (Cheri Media Group, 2009), http://www.roughstock.com/history/ (accessed May 4, 2009).
[12] Point of Grace, "Point of Grace: Gone Country?" (Interview by Country Music Planet, April 2009) http://www.christianmusicplanet.com/news/stories/11576520/ (accessed May 4, 2009).
[13] Paige O'Hara & Robby Benson, Beauty and the Beast, directed by Gary Trousdale, 84 min., Walt Disney Video, 2002, DVD.
[14] Carl W. Stalling, "Who's Afraid of the Big Bad Wolf?" in The Three Little Pigs, directed by Burt Gillet (Walt Disney) 1933.
[15] Richard M. Sherman and Robert B. Sherman, "A Spoonful of Sugar," in Mary Poppins, performed by Julie Roberts, directed by Robert Stevenson (Walt Disney) 1964.
[16] Brenda Chapman & Simon Wells, Prince of Egypt, staring Val Kilmer, 100 min. (Dreamworks Animated) 1998, DVD.
[17] Rob DeLuca & Robert C. Ramirez, Joseph: King of Dreams, staring Ben Affleck, 75 min., (Dreamworks Animated) 2000, DVD.
[18] Joy Williams, "Better than I", in Joy, Performed by Joy Williams (Reunion Records) 2001, Compact Disc.
[19] John Kenrick. 1996. "A History of the Musical: What is a Musical?". Musicals101.com. Accessed May 4, 2009. Available at http://www.musicals101.com/musical.htm
[20] Psalms 55:1-2a New International Version
[21] Brueggemann, Message of the Psalms, 54-55.
[22] Brueggemann, Message of the Psalms, 52.
[23] Harold M. Best, Music Through the Eyes of Faith (New York: Harper Collins, 1993), 188.
[24] Wilma Ann Bailey, Music in Christian Worship. Edited by Charlotte Kroeker, The Sorrow Songs: Laments from the Old Testament and the African Experience, (Collegeville: Liturgical Press, 2005) 75.
[25] Tim Stevens, Pop Goes the Church: Should The Church Engage Pop Culture? (Indianapolis: Power Publishing, 2008) 48.
[26] Psalms 23:4 New International Version
[27] Brueggemann, Message of the Psalms, 19.
[28] Michael Warden, "The Abyss" (The Sojourner Blog, 2009), http://sojournerblog.blogspot.com/2009/01/abyss.html (accessed May 4, 2009).
[29] Willie R. Mangum Jr., "Rent" (ChristianAnswers.net) https://christiananswers.net/spotlight/movies/2005/rent2005.html (accessed May 5, 2009).
[30] Lisa Ann Cockrel, "Rent" (Christianity Today, 2005), http://www.christianitytoday.com/movies/reviews/2005/rent.html (accessed May 5, 2009).
[31] Jonathon Larson, "Will I?", in Rent, Performed by Original Broadway Cast (Dreamworks) 1996, Compact Disc.
[32] Phil Collins, "No Way Out [Single Version]," in Brother Bear performed by Phil Collins (Walt Disney Records) 2003, Compact Disc.
[33] Tim Rice & Elton John, "Endless Night," in The Lion King Broadway Production performed by Original Cast (Avex Trax Japan) 1997, Compact Disc.
[34] Building 429, "Always, Always," in Building 429 performed by Building 429 (INO Records) 2008, Compact Disc.
[35] Mark Schultz, "Letters from War," in Stories and Songs performed by Mark Schultz (Word Records) 2003, Compact Disc.
[36] Claude-Michel Schonberg & Alain Boublil, "Bring Him Home," in Les Miserables (Original London Cast Recording), performed by Colm Wilkinson (DECCA U.S.) 1990, Compact Disc.
[37] SheDaisy, "Come Home Soon," in Sweet Right Here performed by SheDaisy (Lyric Street) 2004, Compact Disc.
[38] Acts 17:28 New International Version
[39] Stevens, Pop Goes the Church, 48.