A minor dilemna

Okay, yes, I have adult ADHD. I have spent several years since my diagnoses learning about the emotional weights that come with having a brain that is wired with ADHD. I'm now going to school to get a masters in Christian Counseling and I want to work with adults with learning disabilities. Why? Because people with learning disabilities struggle in ways that people without learning disabilities cannot understand. But while we're told "stop being lazy!" or "Just do it!", I've learned the vital lesson that when a person with ADHD struggles or fails at a task, we have to ask what we can do differently next time, and to keep trying things until we find something that works. That's not a lecture, but background information for my current dilemna.

I was listening to the local Christian radio on the way to work today and they were talking about getting up early for daily devotions and prayers. And I thought to myself, I wish I had the discipline to do that. And then I was caught in this philosophical dilemna. Because on one hand, I wanted to pray to God and ask Him to help me get up early (or rather, to NOT hit my snooze button for an hour) so that I could do a morning devotion. On the other hand, it occured to me that just handing it to God was a lot like telling myself to just do it - and knowing full well that I wouldn't succeed in the normal conditions. But if I instead ask myself "what can I do to accomplish this?", then I'm trying to solve my own problems instead of giving them to God. Oi!

I suspect that this is a dilemna that we all face in different colors, which is why I am sharing it. I used to tell my mom that you should hand completely over to God everything that you have no control over, and to ask God for wisdom in guidance in handling everything that you do have direct control over. Which, really, is the answer to my own dilemna. So, this morning I pray to God for the wisdom and determination to figure out how to accomplish what I want to accomplish - daily morning devotions.